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Madonna Holds a Press Conference to Announce She’s Relevant

Read all about it!

She’s like a Woody Guthrie with boobs.

This is awesome. In the same week that Radiohead, NIN, and several other major mainstream artists announce they are going their own way from huge labels as a whole, and are finally putting some interesting spin into the new media pitch, aging (does she actually age or stay young with child blood?) music icon Madonna signs a bazzillion dollar deal with Live Nation for three records. See they aren’t a label. But they’ll be just like a label who gives her a taste of ticket sales. Apparently she’s already worth 325 million.

That’s balls. For those who don’t know Live Nation, they sell concert tickets mostly promote gigs and exploit student wages/labor around UVA. There must be some irony somewhere in that the poor woman who was just sued by the RIAA for a quarter of a million is a big Madonna fan. She’s gotta be. They should have Madonna come pick up the lifelong payments super fan will be making. Really exciting groundbreaking stuff here.

Like a vampire.

7 thoughts on “Madonna Holds a Press Conference to Announce She’s Relevant

  1. come on now guys. even though Madge is beyond irrelevant using the “bad” photo from a sequence of 500 paparazzi shots taken on automatic is a little harsh.Also that Radiohead “free” record stunt is BS.. 160kbps?!?!?! Eff that I wouldn’t listen to that lo-def garbage with my enemies ears.

  2. So, it’s BS because they acknowledge that the “lo-def” version of their album is rendered essentially free by modern technology (be it bit-torrent, peer-to-peer or CDR)?I don’t follow. You can still get the high def version you want you’ll just have to pay for it, and that’s no different then the dinosaur record labels want you to do anyway.Quoth Bryce Edge of Courtyard Management in the Financial Times, “As many as half of those who registered for the download had paid more than the minimum 45p transaction fee, Mr Edge indicated, but he described the initiative as “a solution for Radiohead, not the industry”, and defended the superior quality of CD recordings:“You can’t listen to a Radiohead record on MP3 (the digital music file standard) and hear the detail; it’s impossible,” Mr Edge said. “We can’t understand why record companies don’t go on the offensive and say what a great piece of kit CDs are. CDs are undervalued and sold too cheaply.””So if you have the hearing of a bat, or better yet a computer, you can pay for a BOX set cd, receiving not only a CD but two LPs so you can argue all day long about whether digital steps or vinyl sound waves sound better.The really interesting thing about this isn’t that CDs are going away, (in fact the quality of the product intended for the audiophile will increase), but that a band can stand to profit of it’s connection with the fans in light of new technology, instead of trying to punish them. Like say trying to sue them for quarter of a million dollars.As far as Madonna goes, I think one lousy photo does little to counterbalance the 10,000 time my eyes have been slammed by her Blond Ambition. I perhaps did a poor job of explaining it in the post, but once again mainstream media/disguised marketting forces are missing the boat. They make a big deal about Madge leaving a “label” but in essence she is just going to a new type of “label” that doesn’t bank on record sales. Merch and Touring is once again coming to the forefront of profitability and the material girl gets that as well as $120M. But there is nothing revolutionary in her move. She is still banking on a massive “industry” system to send her checks. Whereas, Radiohead has already turned an estimated $9.6M off just the downloads.Get your knives out.

  3. ps – “Madonna Holds Press Conference to Announce She’s Still Relevant” is an old Craig Kilborne joke. Just wanted to give credit in case he reads this blog.

  4. It’s BS to ME because when i got excited about paying the band directly for music and not having to keep a bunch of crappy middlemen in business i found out just before i clicked to pay my $25 (because i respect musicians and value their work) that i would be paying for CRAP. And by having to go buy the CD my money will mostly go to people i don’t really care to support.I NEVER download music for free LITERALLY. I would be fuckin pissed if someone came in and stole the work I do all day and gave it to someone else for free and I won’t be a part of it and that’s the best I can do personally. I just don’t want to be hoodwinked into buying some crap in the name of corporate independence.I don’t contribute to the problem and I want what i fucking pay for..All I said about Maddon’t was that it was a cheap shot. Anyone can name call or make fun of physical attributes.. i just thought it was mildly pointless way to make a point.and …. i do have the ears of a bat. I can hear the difference in CD’s and LP’s (most people can if given the chance). I can hear the difference WILDLY in different mp3 bit rates and if you can’t then you will be happy with lo-def am radio quality sound files.. more power to ya. I just hope fidelity doesn’t get “too expensive” to produce and deliver since the masses are unable to appreciate subtlety so why bother.

  5. The comment about the pic was only about that pick only….remember the EVH pic where he was all wacked out (actually, it turns out he was)? Just one pic to fun of and a great selection for this topic. She looks great for her age and works hard to look good…but I don’t really give a fuck about that.IMO, I agree w/ Steve in that the bit rate blows and I think it’s probably the reason it’s open for whatever you want to pay for it. Also, they had no idea how much money they were going to make with this type of biz model so I’m sure the cost of bandwidth come into question…what if everyone downloaded it for next to nothing? Also, most non-musician listeners/audiophiles could give a shit or even tell the difference between bit rates and would be willing to pay a minimal price to download at 160kb. Now, it happens that Radiohead listens (IMO) are going to respect high quality recordings and so it would probably be in Radiohead’s best interest to offer different bit rates w/ different transaction fees to make sure they cover the cost of bandwidth.I think the big question is…is the Radiohead album any good?

  6. i don’t see this as a moral issue about respecting an artists work. as an artist who plays, records, performs, i feel no disrespect has been made, nor that going after those that are listening to your music (ala metallica) accomplishes anything positive for the artist or the fan.i think you are misunderstanding the point i was making. this is not a moral issue because regardless of the personal stance someone makes, it will be downloaded all day long. you won’t because those are you beliefs and thats very honorable, but it’s not going to change how the world operates. this is a practical issue. getting pissed off and cursing at people you feel are harming artists, well, that isn’t going to help it either way.as far as hoping that high fidelity doesn’t get priced out of existence, again, i think there is a misunderstanding there. that’s why i included the quote that it’s going up either way. so save your dough and wait for it to come it. whether it’s the artist or the middleman selling it… quality costs.i’m also sorry if a joke i made about a woman’s appearance who has built her entire career on image was seen as pointless (as say arguing on the internet?). has anyone ever claimed that madonna writes all her songs.yes we all agree that the bitrate blows. so check it… don’t pay them for it. radiohead just signed a distro deal with XL so everyone is a winner.the album is great.

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